What can you say?

Someone who works in the same building that I do committed suicide this week by parking his car on the train tracks in front of a train. He left a note on his desk for his wife. I didn't know him, I don't think I ever met him, and yet it is still disconcerting and sad.

(no subject)

A meme from charismitaine
1. Leave me a comment saying, “Interview me.”
2. I will respond by asking you 5 questions of a very personal nature.
3. You will update your LJ with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this and an offer to interview someone else in the post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed you will ask them 5 questions.

1. If you had to live out a fairy tale, with all of the ugly bits but with all of the lovely bits too, which one would you choose?

You know, I wouldn't have expected my answer to this question. I have long loved Beauty and the Beast, and I have long wished to be Beauty in Robin McKinley's Rosedaughter. It is a beautiful retelling, and I still want to be like Beauty, and yet I find that it is not the one fairy tale that I would choose to live out. I would live out East of the Sun, West of the Moon, because I am not certain I could, and yet I want to. I want to love so wholly and completely, in spite of my mistakes, that I will go beyond the edges of the world for the sake of the beloved. I want to be so persistent and tenacious of character that I will not give up, that I will continue to search for the beloved beyond hope, through three pairs of iron shoes, and beyond the possible. I do not want to make mistakes, but when I do make them, I want to redeem them, even if it is impossible. I want the wit to know to use the gifts given me, to know how to open the acorns, and when to use what is inside of them. I want my beloved to love me, though I am insignificant and a peasant's daughter; nothing important at all. I want my beloved to be wise and warn me when I am about to do something stupid, to tell me not to light the candle, to let me face the consequences when I do, and yet love me. I want my beloved to have the wisdom to turn my faults around and redeem them, to take the candle wax that I dripped and was my undoing, and make it the means of our reunion and happiness. I want a beloved who will live in an unconventional, little known fairy tale, where it is the girl who does the rescuing, instead of the other way around, and who doesn't care. I want to live happily ever after because I am virtuous, because I love the beloved, because I am tenacious, and because I have learned wisdom.


2. Following question 1, if you could choose a time period and setting for your fairy tale (including modern), what would you choose?

I am not sure that I particularly like this time that we live in; I see much I prefer of the Medieval or Regency times. And yet, I think this is a very good time to live out a fairy tale, because very few people really believe in fairy tales right now. It seems that most people are disillusioned with fairy tales, that they think that they are wish fulfillment, or untrue to life, or overly idealistic. So I would want to flagrantly and ostentatiously prove them wrong. Fairy tales are important, and useful, and generally good (although there are some terrible ones that have quite rightly dropped into oblivion). A modern fairy tale is a hard thing, because it must not slip into the maudlin sentimentality that means nothing, it must have substance, and it must not slip into that biting sarcasm that leaves no room for wonder or truth. A modern fairy tale is hard because it must be rooted and grounded in the everyday and the ordinary (there was scarcely anything more ordinary than a cheap, tallow candle) but it must include the fantastic, and it must be believable. It would be a great challenge to live out a fairy tale today.


3. If you could choose any secondary (or ensemble) character from any TV show to have their own spin-off series, who would you choose and what would their show be like?

I can't believe how long it took me to think of an answer to this question, because it is so glaringly obvious. Spike. Spike needs his own tv show. ( spoiler warning for Buffy 7 and Angel 5 )

4. If you could travel in time with a muscular man named Hans and choose one person for Hans to punch in the face, who would it be?

I cannot think of anyone I particularly would like someone to punch. There are many people I disagree with, but that is generally a civil disagreement, and even though I often wanted to throw Emerson's book against the wall, and I found it most exasperating, I wouldn't think he should be punched for writing it. There are many people I am exasperated with, but I would generally like to grab them by the shoulders and shake some sense into them (such as, for instance, the people who canceled Firefly). There are many wicked people throughout history, but somehow it does not seem appropriate to hit them. To have someone punched is to avenge an insult, and I can't particularly think of anyone who has insulted me.


5. If you had to live for a year on an isolated island--not a desert island, and you aren't shipwrecked, so you won't be fighting for survival. Let's say that you have to pretend to be dead for a year, so you've been dropped off on this island with supplies so that no one can blow your cover. If you could only have one companion, and it could be anyone in the world, or even a fictional character, who would you choose? Or would you instead choose to be alone?

There are a great many literary characters who I would like to have with me on an island, but I am not sure that it would really be worthwhile, because I am not sure that they would want to be with me. For instance, at first thought, it seems like great fun to have Lord Peter Whimsey on the island, but I think that he would always be bored and pining for Harriet. There are similar problems with my favorite literary characters who are quite happy where they are. So then, I shall say that I would like to be on this island with my friend Nikki. It is quite simply that I don't see her nearly enough since we graduated, and I know that we could finally again have just as many conversations, and never have to be interrupted, and it would be fabulous. We had such lovely, long conversations about anything and everything (mostly philosophical in nature) in the lab, in the dorms, and wherever we happened to be. Now we are in different states, and constrained by telephone conversation and meeting perhaps once a year. An entire year on an island would be just the thing.